This post is primarily for the ladies, but men can learn from it too:
As I watched the little girl twirling in her summer dress in front of the church yesterday, I saw something in real life that I'd been reading about in "Captivating" (by Stasi Etheridge) - that all little girls want to be seen and thought of as pretty.
Ladies - I definitely recommend this book, although, I think I'm the last one to read it.
"Captivating" tells us about who God created us to be as women. So far, I've taken 3 major lessons out of the book:
1. Woman was the last thing God created and each creation He spoke into existence was (arguably) more beautiful and complex than the one before. Each part of creation had a specific purpose, but God got more detailed with each succeeding creation. Again, woman was the last thing created. That says A LOT about our complex nature.
2. Woman was created because God saw that is wasn't good for man to be alone. That should give us a BIG clue about our purpose as women. It should tell us that our purpose is to reflect God's heart for relationship. That's why women are seen as more relationship-oriented and men more task-oriented. Women are here to remind that world that God loves relationships, the ultimate relationship being our relationship with Him.
3. Satan really hates women. Why? Well, Lucifer was beautiful and full of himself (Eze 28) and because of his inability to humble himself to God, He was kicked out of heaven. He hates women because we reflect God's beauty. He also hates us because He's all about death and women give life. So, Satan has pretty much been out to get us from the beginning (notice who he approached in the garden) trying to mess w/ our heads about our identity, causing us to doubt our beauty, etc. I'm sure I'm not making this sound as eloquent as the book, but that's the gist of it.
So what does this have to do w/ worship?
I think I've said this before, but an important part of worship is understanding and recognizing who God really is (how can you love and praise something you know nothing about?). As we get closer to Him in worship, we begin to see more of who He is. As we see and acknowlege more of who He is, we begin to understand more of who WE are.
So in recognizing who God created me to be as a woman, I am learning more about Him. That will deepen my worship.
Monday, July 7, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
Random Thoughts
A few things to ponder or try out:
- If hope deferred makes the heart sick (Prov. 13:12), then would hope that is killed permanently damage the heart?
- I wonder how close people have come to knowing the mysteries of God and the spiritual realm. Have you ever been trying to figure out a complicated spiritual matter and came up w/ some theories, but kinda gave up because you couldn't come to a conclusion? I wonder how close we've actually come "solving the mystery" of what God was doing or why something happened at this time, etc.
- Think I mentioned this in my last post, but check out Tommy Walker's "Do it Lord" and "When I Don't Know What to Do." They are great songs.
Okay, I'm done.
As an update, I'm crazy busy right now. Things should slow down a little after this weekend, but I still have a lot on my plate this summer. I don't want to give anything away prematurely, but I think we might see my vision of bridging the gap become more public by the end of the year. Yep, yep...things are moving....
Friday, May 30, 2008
Cure for the Short Term Blues
Hi,
So I feel like that from time to time and I have a cure. Here's what you do:
And these aren't even the best ones I have...
Ever just have one of those days where you're kinda down, unmotivated and not feeling very chipper? You know it's not a deep depression or spiritual low valley. Maybe you feel a little under the weather and not ready to face the world. You know these blues are temporary and you'll probably feel fine tomorrow. But today is just not your day.
So I feel like that from time to time and I have a cure. Here's what you do:
1. Find an outfit that you love and you know you look good in it (make sure it's appropriate for your plans for the day - work, church, the grocery store, etc.).
2. Put that outfit on and accessorize. Prettify your hair too. (Guys: you can just make sure your hair is presentable I guess)
3. Admire yourself in the mirror
At this point, you should already start to feel a little better. You know you look good!
Here's the best part:
4. Go out into the world and show your AWESOME looking self off. Go to work, to church, the grocery store, out w/ friends, to a movie, on a walk around your neighborhood. Yes, today you want people to look at you and admire. And don't act like you're too saved or too cool to care about what others think. Compliments (aka affirmation) and appreciative looks make us all feel good on the right day (or everyday).
5. Accept the compliments gracefully. Remember, nobody likes a cocky, arrogant person.
Okay. So now you're feeling pretty amazing and you might be wondering why you had the blues in the first place. You can either stop here and soak up your exterior awesomeness (not sure what you're inward parts look like) OR you can go for the clincher. Brace yourself cuz this might sound crazy...
6. Find a place that is private and where you feel comfortable. Get out your digital camera. Set up a place for you to pose. And have a photo shoot. I'm not kidding. You might want to remember the day that you looked great so that you know it's possible again.
Yes, I do this sometimes and I promise it helps. Don't believe me?
And these aren't even the best ones I have...
Hey! Don't knock it till you try it!
Happy Friday!
Music to check out: Tommy Walker - "Do it Lord" and "When I Don't Know What to Do." Awesome songs. Check them out.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Update
Hi World,
Nothing super interesting or deep to report.
Still working on that jerk thing. Not easy. Might take awhile.
Life is great, though : ) I'm getting my act together in lots of ways. Yay for growth and change!
Lesson of the Month: Don't rush the process. It might be uncomfortable, painful or just annoying, but don't rush it. Not easy for me cuz I'm the president of the Process Rushers club, but I'm learning. Maybe May is going to be all about learning.
Nothing super interesting or deep to report.
Still working on that jerk thing. Not easy. Might take awhile.
Life is great, though : ) I'm getting my act together in lots of ways. Yay for growth and change!
Lesson of the Month: Don't rush the process. It might be uncomfortable, painful or just annoying, but don't rush it. Not easy for me cuz I'm the president of the Process Rushers club, but I'm learning. Maybe May is going to be all about learning.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Are You A Jerk?
Jerk: someone who regularly gives sarcastic remarks (either under their breath or out loud), makes jokes (even if not overtly evil) at the expense of others, or someone whose words are used to belittle or embarrass another person.
That's the definition of a jerk in the community that I live in. And I must admit that I am a jerk. I use sarcasm like a 2nd language and I'm not sarcastic in a cute, funny way. When I am sarcastic w/ adults, it often walks a fine like between hurtful and funny. And if someone laughs, it's usually not the person the comment is directed at. No, I am not an evil person. I love my friends. I enjoy being around people. I don't walk around w/ the intention to hurt others. Still, there are times when my jerk status is undeniable.
God has been dealing w/ me about this so I've been thinking about it a lot and I'm still trying to work things out in my head, but I would like to share some of the things that I've been learning:
1. I've found that there are at least 2 reasons why someone is a jerk: a) They are bitter about life or a situation or b) On some level, they want to make others feel inadequate or look bad in front of others.
I don't think that A applies to me, so I'm going to talk a little about B. I know it seems harsh, but I couldn't come up w/ any other way to say it. Let's face it, we all belittle others at some point in our lives. The car in front of us on the freeway is driving too slow. We switch lanes, get alongside the car and give the driver "the look" before getting in front of him/her. We give the waiter/waitress a horribly low tip to make sure they know that they did a bad job serving you that night. We give a friend the cold shoulder until they apologize. In all of these situations we are screaming "YOU DID SOMETHING THAT I THOUGHT WAS WRONG AND YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT IT."
Now, I don't think that you shouldn't say something if you were hurt by someone you care about. But the situations I describe above are not good examples of showing love to others.
Let's bring in sarcasm. You are at an event for your church on a Friday night and the event planners have provided food for the people who show up. One of the participants complains that “There isn’t any fruit!” or “Why did they get this chicken? Albertson’s is better than this!”
Response 1: Welcome to a free event w/ free food! It’s customary to not complain if you aren’t paying for it.
Response 2: I’m just happy that it’s free.
You can imagine the tone of each response. Response 1 was sarcastic and didn’t show love, just chastisement, and Response 2 was subtle and calm. I think both responses drive the point across, but #2 was less “jerkful.” There is possibly a better response that isn’t rude, but I think you get the point that that Response 1 was sarcastic AND delivered w/ the intent to “put someone in their place.”
2. The tone we use is often more important than what we say. People often hear our tone before hearing the words we’re saying. So if you sound like you’re being a jerk (even if that’s not your intention), you still have a problem. Recognize it and work on it.
3. Unfortunately, people who don’t know you well are quicker to remember the times when you were a jerk. “Once a jerk, always a jerk” in their eyes. That makes it harder for them to receive when you are showing love or being truthful.
That sucks for me because I’m sure that there are people walking around who really think I’m a mean person and don’t want to get close to me because their experiences w/ me haven’t always involved me showing love to them.
No, I am not saying that you can’t tell sarcastic jokes or make side comments every now and then. What I am saying is that your context is important. Be aware of who is around you, who can hear you. ALSO, don’t assume that everyone is okay w/ sarcasm. Some people just don’t communicate like that. Sure, I can be a jerk to Tonee and Minah once in awhile. They know me well enough to know that I’m not trying to be hurtful and I really do love them. However, not everyone is cool w/ that, so I have to do better.
That's the definition of a jerk in the community that I live in. And I must admit that I am a jerk. I use sarcasm like a 2nd language and I'm not sarcastic in a cute, funny way. When I am sarcastic w/ adults, it often walks a fine like between hurtful and funny. And if someone laughs, it's usually not the person the comment is directed at. No, I am not an evil person. I love my friends. I enjoy being around people. I don't walk around w/ the intention to hurt others. Still, there are times when my jerk status is undeniable.
God has been dealing w/ me about this so I've been thinking about it a lot and I'm still trying to work things out in my head, but I would like to share some of the things that I've been learning:
1. I've found that there are at least 2 reasons why someone is a jerk: a) They are bitter about life or a situation or b) On some level, they want to make others feel inadequate or look bad in front of others.
I don't think that A applies to me, so I'm going to talk a little about B. I know it seems harsh, but I couldn't come up w/ any other way to say it. Let's face it, we all belittle others at some point in our lives. The car in front of us on the freeway is driving too slow. We switch lanes, get alongside the car and give the driver "the look" before getting in front of him/her. We give the waiter/waitress a horribly low tip to make sure they know that they did a bad job serving you that night. We give a friend the cold shoulder until they apologize. In all of these situations we are screaming "YOU DID SOMETHING THAT I THOUGHT WAS WRONG AND YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT IT."
Now, I don't think that you shouldn't say something if you were hurt by someone you care about. But the situations I describe above are not good examples of showing love to others.
Let's bring in sarcasm. You are at an event for your church on a Friday night and the event planners have provided food for the people who show up. One of the participants complains that “There isn’t any fruit!” or “Why did they get this chicken? Albertson’s is better than this!”
Response 1: Welcome to a free event w/ free food! It’s customary to not complain if you aren’t paying for it.
Response 2: I’m just happy that it’s free.
You can imagine the tone of each response. Response 1 was sarcastic and didn’t show love, just chastisement, and Response 2 was subtle and calm. I think both responses drive the point across, but #2 was less “jerkful.” There is possibly a better response that isn’t rude, but I think you get the point that that Response 1 was sarcastic AND delivered w/ the intent to “put someone in their place.”
2. The tone we use is often more important than what we say. People often hear our tone before hearing the words we’re saying. So if you sound like you’re being a jerk (even if that’s not your intention), you still have a problem. Recognize it and work on it.
3. Unfortunately, people who don’t know you well are quicker to remember the times when you were a jerk. “Once a jerk, always a jerk” in their eyes. That makes it harder for them to receive when you are showing love or being truthful.
That sucks for me because I’m sure that there are people walking around who really think I’m a mean person and don’t want to get close to me because their experiences w/ me haven’t always involved me showing love to them.
No, I am not saying that you can’t tell sarcastic jokes or make side comments every now and then. What I am saying is that your context is important. Be aware of who is around you, who can hear you. ALSO, don’t assume that everyone is okay w/ sarcasm. Some people just don’t communicate like that. Sure, I can be a jerk to Tonee and Minah once in awhile. They know me well enough to know that I’m not trying to be hurtful and I really do love them. However, not everyone is cool w/ that, so I have to do better.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Jamfest Recap
Hello!
Now, that life has calmed down a bit (whatever that means), I'm going to give a update on how Jamfest went.
Let me just say, "OH MY LORD!" What a crazy experience. The whole process was just a lot of fun and a great learning experience. I don't even know where to start:
The Look:
So I got professionally styled for Jamfest. No joke! My stylists took me shopping, picked my hairstyle, and came backstage on the night of to do my makeup and dress me. It was quite a production and people kept saying they could hardly recognize me. Of course, that just means that I look "frumpy" every other day of my life. But Mirta and Quita set the standard pretty high for my "look" going forward. Now, EVERYBODY is putting their 2 cents in about how I could look really good if I applied myself. Okay, I'm exaggerating a little bit, but I've definitely had to have more conversations than I'm comfortable w/ lately about how I dress and do my hair.
It was so ridiculous that on Saturday night, I was kinda tense about choosing what to wear for church the next day. "What will people say about this?" "Should I wear my hair like this?" Of course, I happened to be leading on Sunday so everyone was going to see me. Then, I realized that I didn't care anymore. It didn't matter what I wore because it's not about me. And I was ready to give anyone who made a comment about my outfit the "It's Not About Me" lecture, but , thankfully, nobody bothered me.
Enough w/ the tirade....
The Stage:
When Kenny called my name and I stepped on stage, people were standing and cheering, the Praise Team was jumping and cheering too. I had to just stand there smiling until they got quiet. But what an awesome feeling! I felt so much love and support! I LOVE my friends, family and church community. I had been praying before going on stage that this would feel like leading on a Sunday (only, in high heels) and it really did. I felt pretty comfortable up on that stage (until my feet start to hurt).
Afterwards:
I was definitely on the Jamfest cloud for a good 2 days after the event. I was invited to sing "This is Who I Am" at an event in June. People kept asking me when the album is coming out (the answer to that is "soon" - we have a lot of work to do). I could fill up a wall w/ all of the encouraging emails (I will never delete those, by the way).
But I forced myself to get down off the cloud. I was up to lead on Sunday and I didn't want to be performing or showing off in any way.
But, yeah, Jamfest was awesome! I feel so honored to have been asked to minister. I can't wait to see what God has in store!
Now, that life has calmed down a bit (whatever that means), I'm going to give a update on how Jamfest went.
Let me just say, "OH MY LORD!" What a crazy experience. The whole process was just a lot of fun and a great learning experience. I don't even know where to start:
The Look:
So I got professionally styled for Jamfest. No joke! My stylists took me shopping, picked my hairstyle, and came backstage on the night of to do my makeup and dress me. It was quite a production and people kept saying they could hardly recognize me. Of course, that just means that I look "frumpy" every other day of my life. But Mirta and Quita set the standard pretty high for my "look" going forward. Now, EVERYBODY is putting their 2 cents in about how I could look really good if I applied myself. Okay, I'm exaggerating a little bit, but I've definitely had to have more conversations than I'm comfortable w/ lately about how I dress and do my hair.
It was so ridiculous that on Saturday night, I was kinda tense about choosing what to wear for church the next day. "What will people say about this?" "Should I wear my hair like this?" Of course, I happened to be leading on Sunday so everyone was going to see me. Then, I realized that I didn't care anymore. It didn't matter what I wore because it's not about me. And I was ready to give anyone who made a comment about my outfit the "It's Not About Me" lecture, but , thankfully, nobody bothered me.
Enough w/ the tirade....
The Stage:
When Kenny called my name and I stepped on stage, people were standing and cheering, the Praise Team was jumping and cheering too. I had to just stand there smiling until they got quiet. But what an awesome feeling! I felt so much love and support! I LOVE my friends, family and church community. I had been praying before going on stage that this would feel like leading on a Sunday (only, in high heels) and it really did. I felt pretty comfortable up on that stage (until my feet start to hurt).
Afterwards:
I was definitely on the Jamfest cloud for a good 2 days after the event. I was invited to sing "This is Who I Am" at an event in June. People kept asking me when the album is coming out (the answer to that is "soon" - we have a lot of work to do). I could fill up a wall w/ all of the encouraging emails (I will never delete those, by the way).
But I forced myself to get down off the cloud. I was up to lead on Sunday and I didn't want to be performing or showing off in any way.
But, yeah, Jamfest was awesome! I feel so honored to have been asked to minister. I can't wait to see what God has in store!
Monday, April 14, 2008
Jamfest
Shame on me! It's been almost a month since I last updated this blog. I've been busy and I really haven't had much to say, but I think I'd better update this thing w/ a general life update.
So life has been very full lately. There's always something going on. The biggest thing lately has been Jamfest. A couple of months ago, I was asked to be a guest artist at Jamfest, a concert that's held at CSUN that my church/college ministry is responsible for putting on every year. Wow! What an honor. I didn't even know how to respond. I said yes, of course. Jamfest is finally here this week on Wednesday night and I will be an artist along w/ Da Truth (a Christian rapper) and T.C. Bereal (gospel recording artist). I'll be singing 2 songs including "This is Who I Am." Tonee has made a beautiful arrangement that I can't wait to minister on stage. I think the theme of the song is timely.
Practicing and prepping w/ the Praise Team for Wednesday has been great. I'm having so much fun and they've really given me the freedom to do what I want in terms of the arrangement for the 2nd song I'm doing. I've also been in prayer about Jamfest and asking God to prepare me. I felt okay about the preparation up until yestererday. I've kept a pretty clear head about the event - low insecurity level, having fun, not getting cocky. But I didn't quite feel prepared yet. I felt like God needed to do one more shift, but I didn't know what that was. Yesterday, He did it. I basically needed to be broken before Him and vulnerable so that I can minister on Wednesday night. After worship yesterday, I feel sufficiently broken, but also ready to go.
There's so much more I could say about the love and support I've felt during this time of preparation. I could even go on and on about the people who are dressing/styling me for the occcasion (OMG...I wish I could get professionally styled everyday). I could talk about my parents, grandma, family, coworker and friends who are coming to support.....BUT I won't.
Have a good day!
Preview of next update: Sarcasm....love....being a jerk is not always cool or funny.
So life has been very full lately. There's always something going on. The biggest thing lately has been Jamfest. A couple of months ago, I was asked to be a guest artist at Jamfest, a concert that's held at CSUN that my church/college ministry is responsible for putting on every year. Wow! What an honor. I didn't even know how to respond. I said yes, of course. Jamfest is finally here this week on Wednesday night and I will be an artist along w/ Da Truth (a Christian rapper) and T.C. Bereal (gospel recording artist). I'll be singing 2 songs including "This is Who I Am." Tonee has made a beautiful arrangement that I can't wait to minister on stage. I think the theme of the song is timely.
Practicing and prepping w/ the Praise Team for Wednesday has been great. I'm having so much fun and they've really given me the freedom to do what I want in terms of the arrangement for the 2nd song I'm doing. I've also been in prayer about Jamfest and asking God to prepare me. I felt okay about the preparation up until yestererday. I've kept a pretty clear head about the event - low insecurity level, having fun, not getting cocky. But I didn't quite feel prepared yet. I felt like God needed to do one more shift, but I didn't know what that was. Yesterday, He did it. I basically needed to be broken before Him and vulnerable so that I can minister on Wednesday night. After worship yesterday, I feel sufficiently broken, but also ready to go.
There's so much more I could say about the love and support I've felt during this time of preparation. I could even go on and on about the people who are dressing/styling me for the occcasion (OMG...I wish I could get professionally styled everyday). I could talk about my parents, grandma, family, coworker and friends who are coming to support.....BUT I won't.
Have a good day!
Preview of next update: Sarcasm....love....being a jerk is not always cool or funny.
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